keep holding on....

keep holding on.
and that i am.
everyday.
everynight.
always.
when you kiss your godmother on her forehead right after she has passed onto heaven, as she lays in her living room, eyes still open...she felt cold on her forehead when i kissed her...she was gone, gone from this world. we all gathered and hugged and talked as she layed gone right next to us.
it was surreal.
i couldn't stop crying.
her son, who is not a hugger, held onto me so tight and sobbed...
her daughter, went in her room and got me cards that Auntie Barb had planned to give us years  back, with her signature "love Auntie Barb xoxo"
i will forever cherish those cards.
That was December 16, 2012, the day after the horrific tradegy in Newtown, Conn.
I had to tell myself and my cousins, who had just lost their mother and my own mother, who had just lost one of her best friends and dearest cousins...that Auntie  Barb is now with those precious angel children.  Just as she was a school secreatary for so many years...taking care of many babies day to day at the Paul Revere School...she was now the angel secretary taking care of those precious babies taken from their elementary school in Newtown...she was their angel and they were now hers.
that's how we keep holding on...
everyday.
everynight.
always.......